I just wish that I had learned to ask for help when I was young

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When I was seven, I learned to take care of my own feelings.

Not because I wanted to, but because I had to. I cried quietly where no one could see, and I wiped my own tears. I learned to pat myself on the shoulder and say the words I needed to hear, words that gave me comfort, hope, and the strength to keep going. I realized no one was going to help me, so I had to help myself. I became my own support, my own listener, my own strength.

I told myself, “I can do this alone.”

“I can carry this by myself.”

And I did. I carried problems that weren’t even mine. I tried to heal pain that I didn’t cause. I kept everything inside, thinking that if I just stayed quiet, no one would have to worry about me. I thought being strong meant never showing pain.

But now, when I look back, I see how heavy those feelings were. I see how lonely I really was. The pain I kept hidden grew deeper and harder to carry.

I just wish that while I was learning to wipe my tears, pat my own shoulder, speak kind words to myself, and stay strong, I also learned how to ask for help. I wish someone had taught me that asking for help doesn’t make you weak.

If I had let someone see me hurting, maybe I wouldn’t have felt so alone. Maybe my heart wouldn’t have broken so badly. Maybe the pain wouldn’t have felt this big if I had let someone share it with me, even just a little.

I think about what it would’ve been like to say, “I’m not okay.”

To tell someone I needed help, to have someone hold my hand and say, “You’re going to be alright.” I wish I had known that asking for help takes courage, not weakness.

Maybe then, I wouldn’t have had to fight all those hard battles by myself. Maybe the nights wouldn’t have been so long. Maybe the silence wouldn’t have been so loud. Maybe I could’ve felt lighter, softer, and not so scared.

I still carry the lessons I learned, how to comfort myself, how to be strong. But now I also carry a new hope. I hope I can tell my younger self, and others who feel the same way, that it’s okay to ask for help. We’re not supposed to carry everything alone. And sometimes, the bravest thing we can do is say, “I need help”

Because no matter how strong we are, we all need someone sometimes. And I just wish I had learned that when I was young.