It’s Not the Wedding That Matters, It’s the Heart of the Person Standing at the End of the Aisle

Even when I was still a child, I never dreamed of getting married.

While others pictured themselves in white gowns, holding bouquets, and smiling at the altar, I never saw myself there. I never imagined saying yes to a ring, wearing a veil, or having a family of my own. I never pictured myself walking down an aisle filled with flowers, with all eyes on me, ready to say vows to someone I love. Not because I didn’t want love—but because I was afraid of what comes after.

I grew up in a house where love slowly disappeared. I saw two people who once loved each other now only talk in shouts and silence. I saw how promises faded. I saw how a marriage that began with so much hope ended in broken pieces. And that image stayed with me.

It made me think that maybe marriage is scary.

Maybe love doesn’t last. Maybe forever is just a word people say when they’re happy—until they’re not. And then I grew older, and the fear only deepened. I witnessed cheating, betrayal, lies, and separation. I saw couples holding hands one day and tearing each other apart the next. I saw people leave after years of saying they would stay.

But with time came a different kind of clarity.

Marriage isn't the scary part.

It’s not the wedding. It’s not the dress or the rings or the vows. It’s not the flowers or the guests or the photos. It’s not the legal papers or the big celebration.

What’s truly scary is the person you choose to stand beside you at the end of the aisle.

Because how can someone who once looked at you with love, now look at you like a stranger? How can someone who promised to stay, be the first one to walk away? How can someone who once said “I choose you,” choose someone else behind your back? How can someone who said you were their forever, be the one to break you?

It’s not marriage that destroys people. It’s not the idea of commitment that hurts. It’s the people who take love for granted. It’s the ones who make promises they never intend to keep. It’s the ones who give up too easily when love asks for patience. It’s the ones who lie, cheat, and grow tired when things get difficult.

The wedding is just a day. The real challenge starts after the celebration, when life becomes ordinary again, and love has to survive through boring days, hard nights, and endless trials.

So no—I don’t dream of weddings. I dream of someone who will choose me every single day.

Someone who won’t stop loving me when I’m no longer easy to love. Someone who won’t leave when I’m at my lowest. Someone who doesn’t see marriage as a finish line but as the beginning of a lifelong choice.

It’s not the beauty of the wedding that defines forever. It’s the heart of the person standing at the end of the aisle. Because a beautiful wedding can’t save a careless heart. But a kind, faithful heart can make even the simplest wedding the start of something real.

And if I ever choose to walk down the aisle one day, I hope I’m walking toward someone whose love will still feel the same after all the flowers have wilted, the guests have left, and the music has stopped. Someone whose heart is more beautiful than any dress, any venue, or any ring.

Because in the end, it’s not the wedding that matters. It’s the heart that stays.